I woke up late. I got my second-grader up and ready for school. The indoor kitten escaped and we had to chase him around the yard. I drove my daughter to school with my hair sticking up like Phyllis Diller and my mascara from the day before streaked down my face. My purple pajamas and my bunny slippers on. It’s ok, they can’t see me in the car. Oops, we’re late… the bell has rung. Oh no! New principal with a new policy… kids arriving in car pool after the bell must be signed in by their parents! HORROR OF HORRORS! The carpool teacher tells me I must go inside the school to sign in my child. I tell my daughter QUICK! jump out of the car! I put my foot down on the gas pedal and fly out of the parking lot. Whew! I made it! Seconds later… guilt… what if they don’t allow her to go to class because she isn’t signed in? I swallow my pride. I suck it up, I have to go back. I turn the minivan around and return to school, braless, shoeless, deodorantless. I find a parking space and slink into the building. I am met with the school secretary who immediately begins to snicker and stare. Once she gathers herself, she tells me “Don’t worry, I already signed your daughter in”. As I turn to go, she breaks into a pee your pants laugh that doesn’t stop.
Let this be a warning to all you mothers. You never know when the school rules are going to change. It could happen to you. At least I didn’t run out of gas on the way home.